Why are you still here?

Go and read this, the best blog ever, instead.

Go away from here

Hello HYG 'fans'. This blog has got a new home. And a new name. It's still pretty much the same old waffle but without the pink background.

It is called 'Survivor Envy', for some reason.

There you will find stuff about:

>> Music

>> Clubs

>> Other things


Visit the 'latest and greatest' music blog to hit the internet right now.

THANKS.

Some songs we have been listening to

We haven’t done one of these for a while. Here’s the latest shit we’ve been caning in 320.

Marina and the Diamonds – Mowgli’s Road
Purely amazing yodel-based eccentripop from Marina and her actually non-existent backing crew. This sounds like Tori Amos leading a band of angels down a spiral staircase to another dimension. Nothing, as far as we can tell, to do with the Jungle Book :(

VV Brown – Quick Fix
VV inspires polka-dotted arse wiggling with yet more cartoonish retropop, this time mixing her Monster Mash-tastic sound with pounding drums and a hint of surf guitar.

Calvin Harris – I’m Not Alone
Everyone’s favourite Scottish electropop star returns with some epic arms aloft-type shenanigans. In the words of humanitarian messiah Pete Tong, “fancy some euphoric?” YES PLEASE.

The Prodigy – Invaders Must Die (LP)
Occasionally exciting but mostly unnecessary banging and clattering from Liam Howlett, featuring sidemen Keith Flint and Maxim Reality, who chip in with ‘menacing’ ‘vocal’ ‘stabs’. That bit where ‘Omen’ kicks back in and sounds like a fairly decent car going into fifth gear is pretty good.

Empire Of The Sun – We Are The People (Modernaire remix)
Band of the moment see their windswept wonder given a groovesome gothdisco makeover by local heroes Modernaire, who you can see live at the Deaf Institute this Friday (6th) (get more clubbing and music-type updates at this here Manchester club blog).

Lady Sovereign – So Human
We’ve been listening to the new stuff by ‘The Sov’ but will probably do a separate post on that.

Mongrel – Hit From The Morning Sun (96 Bulls remix)
Highly politicised ‘n’ controversial supergroup headed by former reverend the Rev. John ‘The Reverend’ McClure reverend get themselves a bass-heavy reswizzle on this fidgety main room edit by Melbourne outfit 96 Bulls, who, incidentally, are named after the number of bovine beasts it takes to produce enough shit for one of McClure’s onstage rants.

.

Newsflash! LOL

S'up. Word reaches 'HYG Towers' that digital disco Clique are lining up a massively amazing special guest for their slot at the Mint Lounge at the end of this month (27th, FYI).

We'll give you all the details as soon as things are confirmed, but here are some clues to keep you guessing:

1) It is a person
2) They will be playing some records
3) It is not someone from a band
4) Or is it
5) Etc

Who could it be??!!!

.

Little Boots live alert

Let’s have a look at this video of Little Boots fannying around with a... thing.



PUT THE JOKE ABOUT THE ETCH-A-SKETCH HERE.

But why are we looking at this video?

Well, in case you haven’t heard, Little Boots is playing at Night & Day on the 7th March.

Various people have been busy selling limbs in order to get tickets for the show, but two folks who needn’t worry are Sam and James from hot new dancepop night S’il Vous Plait, because they – lucky fuckers – will be warming up for ‘The Boots’ with a selection of their finest finery.

If you’d like to learn more about S’il Vous Plait, some illiterate fool did a Q&A with them that you can read by clicking here. On the same website you can find a review of Little Boots’ headline slot at last year’s Popjustice In The City showcase, where the same illiterate fool crowbarred in the line

2009 will be a big year for Little Boots

purely so that, when her album goes Top 30, he will be able to feel a momentary glow of satisfaction, before reverting to the crushing void of self-worth he normally inhabits.

FYI it’s not an Etch A Sketch with flashing lights that Little Boots is playing with, as impressive as that would be. It is in fact a Yamaha Tenori-on. So now you know.

.

A bit harsh, surely?

We're not exactly Duffy's biggest fan, but surely the Daily Mail's take on her picking up three Brit Awards last night is a bit over the top...

.

Spotted!!!

The new Basshunter video being filmed in Sheffield.

"It was so amazing my eyes bled," says our spy.

.

Brit Awards 2009: live blogging

Or not. We were out last night (see below) so we sent roving reporter Holly C to her sofa to get all the dirt on the Brit Awards 2009. Her special report follows.

The Brits Awards 2009, observations:

Bad things:

1) Bono in eyeliner. At least now we know why he never removes his glasses.

2) Duffy winning best album. Literally WTF?! Granted I can't stand Radiohead and Coldplay but that left Elbow who won the sodding Mercury and whose album has topped various lists voted for by the 'industry' (the same 'industry' who vote for the Brits...) and the Ting Tings who made a fantastic pop album. They've basically given the award to a woman whose only 'talent' is being the 60s. The entire decade.

3) Fern Cotton trying to present.

4) Kylie's inability to move her face.

5) The Tings Tings/ Estelle 'collaboration'. Now I might be wrong, but I thought the whole point of a collaboration was to do something a bit different, meld songs and artists together to create the ultimate in pop spectacle. On paper, like the Girls Aloud/ Sugababes Comic Relief single, it should have been amazing. In practice, it was like one of those bad dreams you have where you suddenly find yourself in an exam room with no idea what you're meant to be doing. At the very least, if you're going to do a 'mash up', make sure the songs you use are the same fucking BPM! What you had was not a collaboration but two gigs taking place simultaneously on the same stage.

6) Girls Aloud not winning best band.


Good things:

1) Girls Aloud. The fan dancing, the dresses, the second set of dresses, Sarah's speech. Utterly perfect.

2) Elbow winning best band. Personally I'm surprised it wasn't Duffy but at least it meant we didn't have to endure Coldplay or Radiohead.

3) The spotlight operator leaving Duffy's face in darkness for the first half of her performance.

Other things:

1) Are Take That going in a new Kraftwerk inspired direction?

2) Why was Lady Ga Ga dressed as a chamberpot for the PSB performance?

3) What the hell is wrong with Duffy's face? She's only 24, that can't be natural. Or is the 60s look that of a blow up doll?
.

We went to watch Tricky last night and it was exciting

We went to watch famous Bristolian whisperer Tricky perform last night (see the incredibly professional gig photography below). It was very exciting. It was probably more exciting than watching the Brit awards on television, but also – if you think about it – not as exciting at all, really.

Here are some of the exciting things that happened at the gig:

:: Tricky was naughty and smoked on stage – does he not know there is a smoking ban??!!

:: There was nearly a fight between Tricky and the security guard who tried to make him put the cigarette (it was definitely a cigarette and nothing else) out. Cue hilarious intervention by a member of the singer’s entourage.

:: Simon Price (or someone who looked a lot like Simon Price, with the pointy hair and those things he has on top of his head) was there, nodding.

:: Lots of people from Chorlton went and shouted things like “Yea’ man” as they danced. They must have been happy because they all had big grins on their faces and they all tilted their heads back and grabbed at the air around them as if groping a warm and soft blanket.

:: We think they were on drugs.

:: Tricky’s encore lasted 40 minutes and consisted of three songs.

:: THREE SONGS IN FORTY MINUTES.

:: A potentially amazing cover of ‘Ace Of Spades’ was cut short by a curfew-crazed venue, with Tricky announcing that he hopes to never play there again.

:: Tricky’s set was engaging and intense, like a phone call from an ex boyfriend, rising and falling from troughs of pin-dropping quietness to peaks of cacophonous noise. Material from last year’s ‘Knowle West Boy’ album sat well alongside older tracks, including a brain-melting rendition of ‘Karmacoma’ (or ‘Overcome’, or whatever he wants to call it).

Overall: 7/10

We did a full review of the gig that you can read on this website here.

Also we did an article about Tricky a couple of weeks ago which you could have read if you'd just taken the time to click on the words 'article about Tricky' earlier in this sentence.

.

Brit Awards 'GOLD'

Substantial thanks to friend of the blog and Clique promoter Ian, who got in touch recently with some excellent footage from the famously distastrouts (Microsoft so-called Word actually allowed that typo – what a piece of fucking shit).

Anyway, the famously disastrous 1989 Brit Awards, starring Mick Fleetwood and Sam Fox, a double act who would later go on to inspire the name of popular beat combo the Fleet Foxes. Probably.

You can view the ceremony in ten chapters by cliking the link above.

When you do, look out for these highlights, as chosen by our correspondent:

- Kenneth Baker rightly feeling the HATE of uk yoof
- Bros live, following up that 'I watch you crumble like a very old wall' lyric with some tremendously shit scatting into a guy's sax
- Every single time Sam Fox and Mick Fleetwood do or say anything
- The whole Cliff Richard Tory apologist shitfest (keep an eye out for when he's walking down the stairs past a scummy old man smoking a cig like a tramp waiting for a bus)
- The Four Tops/Boy George lolfest
- The way Tanita Tikaram and all them other worthy and now pointless singer-songwriters combine faux-humility with an "I am creating important art, deify me" vibe.
- Annie Lennox twatting herself in the eye with her spikey Brit award
- Carol Decker's wildly inappropriate melismatics in that final horrorshow song
- Phil Collins being the most coked-up person ever seen anywhere ever

and countless countless more.

Enjoy.

.

Hello again

We’re back. Long time off from music blog duties. While we’ve been away, blah blah, Lady Gaga, blah blah, ‘Put A Donk On It’ blah blah blah, Girls Aloud record run of Top Ten singles – blah blah blah – The Saturdays amazing/annoying, blah, Kid Cudi Crookers cover blah blah, Twitter, astonishing new Calvin Harris single blah blah blah, La Roux, ridiculous new Pussycat Dolls single, Christmas, New Year, Ladyhawke amazingness, some other stuff we can’t remember.

Let’s celebrate our return with a video from last night’s Brit awards. It is the Pet Shop Boys doing their Lifetime of Achievement in Outstanding Contributions to Pop in the Music Industry performance.



Neil Tennant is pretty cool, isn’t he? It’s not often you get to edit the greatest magazine of all time and be in one of the best pop bands ever. Fucking hell.

.

The Birthday Party

hip young gunslinger, like the Queen and Cheryl Tweedy on Girls Aloud’s 2007 calendar, has two birthdays. The first, September 25, marks the very first time we posted ‘content’ on the blog. It was a lengthy (827 WORDS) rant about something Kasabian had said about Justin Timberlake.

Our second official birthday, December 5, represents the date we started posting stuff to the blog ‘full-time’ (ie every now and again). That particular piece was an in-depth analysis of the new Girls Aloud calendar. hyg: always tackling the big issues.

Today is the second second birthday of our little music blog. It has been a very nice two years. At times we have felt like not bothering and at times we have felt like not being here at all but that was always for different reasons. Overall, it’s been fun.

Here are some people we would like to say thank you/hello to on this momentous occasion. This lot have been brilliant in various help and support-based ways. Apologies to anyone we’ve missed out:

Peter Robinson, Danny McFadden, Holly Coy, Sarah Lord, Ian Jones, all the people who fixed up interviews, gave us stuff or got us into gigs for free, Melissa Rose, Justin Heaton, Damien Johnstone, Gary Ryan, various people at CityLife.co.uk, Rachael Burns, Jon Grant, James Morton, Mat Payne and everyone who has stopped by for a read.

Many happy returns etc

x

.

Master Shortie: not very much like Adele

Here is the video for Dead End by Master Shortie. If you haven’t heard of Master Shortie, he is a 19 year old MC/producer ‘type’ from London. His real name is not Master Shortie. It is Theo Kerlin. In many ways, Master Shortie is the new Adele. Let’s have a look at some of those ways:

:: He is from London
:: He went to the Brit School for a bit
:: Um
:: He mixes fluoro indie, grime and pop to make thrustworthy party records
:: Probably not that last one.

So, as we have seen, Master Shortie is nothing like Adele.

Let’s have a look at the video for Dead End, then. The song is an upbeat indiegrime stomp, which is basically about Master Shortie reading far too much into looking at an attractive girl. He sees her in the first verse and spends the rest of the song going on about how he would quite like to have sex with her, but how he can’t have sex with her, because he’s got a girlfriend, for a start, and he lives with his mum and doesn’t like having sex when his mum’s at home.

Bonus feature: samosa-based simile.

Observe:



You might not like it at first but it does get better.

Visit the official Master Shortie blog.

.

The Quietus' mime guy: we know him (sort of)

Some of you, particularly those of you that read Popbitch, the Daily Star, the Time Out Chicago blog or the b3ta newsletter, may already have seen this, but the Quietus have got a fun little game at the moment which basically involves looking at a mime and then guessing which classic album covers he is recreating.

You can play it by clicking the picture below.

So, did we mention that we know (sort of) the Quietus mime guy? He is a very nice chap. We stayed at his house once when we went to London, sleeping on a settee outside his bedroom. Apart from that night we got drunk and passed out on his bed and then got kicked out when he came home at 4am. Anyway. Very nice and a fine actor. He was also in this:



Fiery.

.

Roisin Murphy live: amazing

We went to watch Roisin Muprhy live last week. It was amazing. Here is a review:

“Next time, more anarchy,” pouts Roisin Murphy from her position atop a heavily oversubscribed crowd barrier. And while her sentiment may be commendable, most of the audience would probably settle for “Next time, less jazz.”

Tonight sees the Irish electro psychopath giving textbook demonstrations of her best and worst sides. For the former, she wheels out seven-minute, kitchen sink versions of her biggest hits accompanied by kaleidoscopic rave visuals that both dazzle and terrify. For the latter, she sits on a stool and croons smoky lounge numbers towards a hat with a face.

While Roisin’s noodlier sojourns take her dangerously close to losing the crowd, the times she slips back into electropop superstar mode have them eating out of her wildly expressive hands.

Disco dancing with a huge reflective disc pulled down across her face, it’s easy to see why many people find Murphy’s visual style as captivating as her line in polished machine pop.

She opens the show with a salvo of Overpowered and You Know Me Better, tonight rendered as epic electro behemoths. Alongside mesmerising visuals, each builds until no one there – least of all Roisin – is quite sure what is going on.

After a regrettable BPM dip and several costume changes, Roisin blasts through some of her more uptempo numbers, including an encore featuring her version of Bryan Ferry’s Slave To Love, supercharged to the point where it sounds even more like the Doctor Who theme after a strong dose of poppers than normal.

She closes the set with a gingham deer strapped to her back, mock-fighting her dancers. If only all of the show could have been so entertaining.

Summary:

:: Ridiculous costume alert: basically two shop dummies strapped to her front and back.
:: Amazing dancing.
:: Disappointing jazz sections.
:: The good thing about Roisin is that, even with all the highly cultural performance aspects of her live show, you always get the sense she is having brilliant fun. Silly dancing, outlandish costumes and stomping around the stage like a little sparrow – you don’t get that at an Oasis gig.
:: This – minus the half hour of noodling balladry – is exactly how popstars should be.
:: Roisin is, let’s be honest here, incredibly fit.
:: Let’s have a video to celebrate:



Very good.

Read more stuff like this at this exciting music blog.

OH GIVE IT A REST

From the Times Online:

Come on now. Enough of this. Isn’t it time, after 12 long months, for the Ting Tings to stop giving it the wide-eyed, Noel-from-Hear’say, “we didn’t expect any of this it’s just amazing that it’s happened to us we were just ourselves and look what happened to little old us” act and get on with making their second album?

What are they grateful for and baffled by, anyway? Sony’s massive investment and subsequent meticulously orchestrated promo campaign? Or the simple fact that no one stopped them putting ‘Traffic Light’ on their debut?

It was around this time last year we wrote about the Ting Tings live before anyone else in the world had even written about them but after everyone who had already done it had done it. Go us.

.

HRNK! Last minute club-based Italo 'sesh' alert

Anyone wishing to soak up the last few drops of 2008’s Great Italo Goldrush should head to the Deaf Institute-based Now Wave tonight, where they’ve got Little Boots and Heartbreak dishing out ice cold electro upstairs from 10pm.

We saw Little Boots twice in the space of one weekend recently and she only got better between shows. From this, we can scientifically deduce that tonight’s set will be PROPERLY FUCKING AMAZING.

Let’s have a video of Little Boots and Heartbreak to celebrate.



That was them doing a cover of International Music System's ‘Dancing Therapy’. FYI.

Tickets for Now Wave featuring Little Boots and Heartbreak are available from Piccadilly Records, behind the bar at the Deaf Institute or, if you’re the lazy sort, on the door. You can now get more alerts and chatter like this on a shiny new Manchester club blog.

The seven best bits of Kanye West's Glow In The Dark live show

Kanye West, of number one human being fame, played in town on Monday. To call the show spectacular would be – and we really can’t be bothered thinking of a simile here – an understatement.

Here are the top seven bits of the gig:

:: The bit where a giant space monster with red eyes came on stage and ate Kanye West

:: The bit where Kanye West told a spaceship that he “just needed some pussy”

:: The bit where Kanye West played Stronger

:: The bit where Kanye West did this little ‘spinning-on-the-spot’ dance

:: The bit where Kanye West apologised for having ruined all other gigs for the rest of time by bringing the spectacular Glow In The Dark show to Manchester.

:: The bit where some giant balls with pictures of blow up dolls projected onto them descended from the ceiling towards Kanye West and he had a little natter with them

:: The bit where Kanye West played a 47-minute version of Love Lockdown to finish

We’ve got some photos of the gig, courtesy of our incredibly professional live snapper, that we’ll ‘whack up’ when we get a minute. We went to the show to review US sensation Santogold’s support slot. This is because we had a deep interest in checking out her live set and definitely not because we just wanted free tickets to go and see Kanye West. Have a look at the Santogold review.

.

Solange is better than Beyoncé

We went to watch Beyoncé’s little sister Solange at Manchester’s glamorous the Ruby Lounge the other night. It was very good. It was a lot better than we thought it was going to be actually.

We reviewed said gig for the local paper, although they chopped the bit out where we said Sandcastle Disco was like “the sort of handbag heartbreak that Holland-Dozier-Holland would surely have crafted if they’d had access to Pro Tools”.

Here is Sandcastle Disco. It’s the sort of handbag heartbreak that Holland-Dozier-Holland would surely have crafted if they’d had access to Pro Tools.

Special features of the video:

:: Drawn-on weather effects
:: Balloons
:: Drumsticks that change colour



Amazing. 8/10

.

The Unstoppable Team: a team that is unstoppable (except maybe with the right sort of safety barriers, although that is sort of missing the point)

The Unstoppable Team – Get Back

Have you heard ‘Get Back’ by The Unstoppable Team? It is amazing. If songs were to be summed up on those little newspaper boards you see outside shops, this one would say

SPIKY STACCATO VERSES GIVE WAY TO SKY-SIZED MEGACHORUS IN INDIE EMCEEING THRILLER

The Unstoppable Team are a new band from Manchester, currently working their way around the city’s venues with their stylish fusion of streetsmart lyrics and arms aloft guitar pop. We’ve been in touch with the band and they tell us that they’re a bit fed up with the number of pay-to-play sharks circling the waters of unsignedville. So if you’re a promoter who is in to new music but not too keen on fucking new bands up the arse, hit them up via MySpace.

The band plays at Moho tomorrow (FRIDAY 21) night as part of that Aftershow thing. We’d be going down ourselves if it wasn’t for the fact we’ll be out of the country. Details here.

.